College Times

Issue date: 8/14/08 Section: Sex

Media Credit: Photos.com

Imagine you're having sex with your boyfriend or if one-night-stands are your thing, then envision that sexy stranger you brought home. Do you ever wonder what your bedmate or boy-toy is thinking, or more specifically fantasizing about, when you're bouncing around between the sheets?

With scientific studies reporting that 91 percent of men fantasize during sex and statistics from The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University suggesting that 54 percent of men think about sex every day, it's no wonder some women find themselves wondering whether it's her he is thinking about - or someone else. Past lovers, movie stars, people in uniforms, teachers, rock stars, friends or strangers - take your pick.

In an article on TimesOnline.com, according to Dr. Mitch Waterman and Tamara Tuner-Moore - a psychologist and Ph.D. student who plans to conduct a definitive study of male sexual fantasy at Leeds University - surprisingly, the most common fantasy that men focus on is having sex with a loved partner.

However, male sexual fantasies can include a number of different scenarios, and whether you like it or not, sometimes different people. Research has found popular fantasies among men are having sex with more than one partner (yes, girl-on-girl action still holds a high spot on the charts), watching a partner have sex with someone else, watching or being watched while having sex, doing things you would never do in reality, having sex in public or in an exotic location, being the one who dominates, doing all kinds of sex acts, role-playing and even forcing someone to have sex.

You can't blame a guy for using the power of his imagination, but now you may be wondering why. Why do guys feel they need to focus on something far from reality instead of the woman lying in front of them?

One study highlighted in an article on ScienceDaily.com, reports scientist Juan Carlos Sierra's recent research, published in Psychological Reports reveals, "Men respond more positively towards sexual stimuli and thoughts, and they accept them more easily. The male population has an attitude that, together with sexual fantasies, heightens sexual drive."

Waterman adds, "Evolutionary psychologists have suggested that sexual fantasies contribute to the facilitation of sexual arousal, which, in turn, facilitates procreation. Thus sexual fantasies may play an important, previously unrecognized, role in the continued propagation of the human species. (On the other hand) Freudian pyschotherapists and psyschoanalysts, by contrast, have speculated that our fantasies may have developed as a means both of gratifying wishes and conquering intrusive memories of early traumatic experiences (during childhood)."

Whatever the case, most men tend to keep their sexual fantasies to themselves for fear of offending their female partner or due to a sense of guilt or shame. Silly as that is, it's probably for the best, unless of course you enjoy hearing about your man's fantasies. Women need not worry, because what it comes down to is a man's sexual fantasies are dreams, but you, ladies, are a dream come true - in the flesh.

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