Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Lauren Kawam10. Stand motionless silent in the corner, facing the wall and never get off.
9. Ask others that get on if you can push the button for them, but push the wrong ones.
8. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then berate them screaming “That's mine!" and other sorts of possessive terms.
7. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the other riders.
6. Yell “Hug it out, Bitch” and then force everyone in for a group hug.
5. Glance and grin at another people for a while, then smile and say, “I just got new socks. First day I’m wearing them.”
4. When there's only one other rider in the elevator, poke them and then deny it was you when they ask you about it.
3. Press all the buttons when you get on, and then when the elevator stops at every floor, yell, “All Aboard!”
2. Strike up a conversation with someone else and use air quotes at the completely wrong times. Then, when you need them, don’t use them.
1. Just for old time’s sake because I know what you were thinking: Initiate the “horizontal hustle,” if you will, while riding from floor 20 all the way to floor 1.
Viewing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
Greensboro Flooring
posted 8/31/09 @ 9:16 AM MST
You are one funny fellow:)) I can suggest one other thing but that works only with some type of elevator. You can try and climb on the small edge that stands above the elevator floor. (Continued…)
Hah..........
posted 8/31/09 @ 5:37 PM MST
I especially enjoyed #5. "Glance and grin at another people for a while". I know you can say it's being picky, but is it really too much to ask for one article or top 10 to not sound as if it was written by a ten year old?? And to "Greensboro Flooring", what exactly are you huffing? Nowhere in your weird, off-in-space ramble, did I figure out what you're talking about or what type of practical joke anyone would use or find funny from it. (Continued…)
blakely
posted 9/04/09 @ 5:29 PM MST
OMG that is hilarious!
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