Top 10 Things I Envy About Hipsters
Christina CaldwellIssue date: 6/4/09 Section: Top 10s
4. Tight pants. Personally, I wear tight pants even though I'm not a hipster. But it's the hipster girl's ability to get her man to wear skin-tight girl pants that really impresses me. I've tried and failed.
3. They legitimately discover music before anyone else does. Hipsters like to brag about how they knew a band before they turned big and shitty. Sadly, they're usually right. Hipsters send their own music to college radio stations, which get played and turned out to the masses, which usually takes between six months and two years.
2. They have downplayed the role of personal hygiene in everyday life. Who has time to shower when you have to ride your fixie to Tucson's newest vegan restaurant?
1. They survive in Portland, Oregon, despite an 11.5 percent unemployment rate. I'm dying to move to the Northwest. Knowing that it is unlikely that I'll be able to get a job in this economic environment has held me back. Still, the hipsters flock loyally (or blindly) to that cloudy, free-range, organic city in the North to become janitors and carnival ride operators.
3. They legitimately discover music before anyone else does. Hipsters like to brag about how they knew a band before they turned big and shitty. Sadly, they're usually right. Hipsters send their own music to college radio stations, which get played and turned out to the masses, which usually takes between six months and two years.
2. They have downplayed the role of personal hygiene in everyday life. Who has time to shower when you have to ride your fixie to Tucson's newest vegan restaurant?
1. They survive in Portland, Oregon, despite an 11.5 percent unemployment rate. I'm dying to move to the Northwest. Knowing that it is unlikely that I'll be able to get a job in this economic environment has held me back. Still, the hipsters flock loyally (or blindly) to that cloudy, free-range, organic city in the North to become janitors and carnival ride operators.
Spring Break


Viewing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
Ben
posted 6/20/09 @ 5:18 AM MST
Admit it. You're a hipster too.
ken
posted 10/08/09 @ 2:50 PM MST
Regarding number 1, the hipsters ability to survive in Portland. Let us not forget that hipsters do not generally have jobs or gainful emplyment. This is not nescessary when one receives a monthly check from the parents to cover all PBR & Parliament cigarettes related expenses. (Continued…)
A. Bell
posted 10/11/09 @ 7:28 PM MST
You are either
(a) stupid to be admiring hipsters
(b) a hipster
or
(c) being sarcastic and ironic. see (b).
Post a Comment