College Times

Issue date: 7/2/09 Section: Top 10s

When you are at a party, there is usually a lot going on. People are drinking, talking, laughing, puking, trying to hook up and some other crazy things. You get to meet cool new people and you to meet people you wish you didn't meet.
No matter what "big" party it is, there seems to be a same sort of "generalized" group of people who stand out more than others.

10. Guy who thinks he knows everyone. This guy is overly-confident in himself. He imagines that everyone he has met one time before remembers him. He will walk up to you like he has been your buddy for years, even though he has only met you once, last year. Guy, no one remembers you. You aren't that cool.

9. Person who only knows you. This is even worse than the guy who thinks he knows everyone. This is the person who shows up at the party alone. The only intention of this person is to "hopefully" make a friend. So, they recognize you from high school and you are stuck with them the rest of the night.

8. Girl who shows up in an outfit that shows waaaaay too much skin. To this girl, we get it, you don't have self-respect. Maybe one day you will realize drinking and skanky clothes don't work together. Guys don't really like you. They just like what they see. They don't hear anything you say past "Hi, my name is …" Then you hook up with this guy who didn't hear a word you said. The next morning you post a bulletin about how all guys are dirtbags and no one respects you. Well, I wonder why!? Put on some clothes.

7. Guy whose only mission is to hook up with a girl for the night. He comes off kind of creepy but is somewhat attractive. He can be found with the girl above.

6. Person who just got dumped. This person sucks because all they talk about the whole night is how much they don't care about their ex and how they never needed them anyway. So, they pretend they are drinking because they want to prove they don't need their ex to have fun. But really, they are drinking their misery away. This leads to the next person.

5. Girl who is crying by the end of the night. Two people try to comfort this crying party-pooper while the other people at the party are thinking "who the heck brought this girl?"

4. Guy who is so drunk he doesn't talk. Perfect for the girl who is crying. She pours out her emotions while he sits and seems like he is listening. Really, he has no idea what is going on and is too drunk to walk away.

3. Girl/Guy who loves everyone. When this person drinks, hugs and high-fives for everyone! I like this person. You can come to my party anytime.

2. Big asshole. He talks shit to everyone. He is also the loudest there. He knows he is an asshole and wants everyone at the party to know, too. He thinks this makes him "cool." You want to punch this guy.

1. Super drunk guy. As soon as he gets to the party, he drinks as many beers as he can. He is usually the first to start puking in the corner by the tree. Everyone else can be found laughing at him or being totally repulsed. Super drunk guy is always the same person, if you tend to party with the same people. No one tells him he has a problem. This is because it is too funny to place bets on how long it will be until he pukes this time.

Page 1 of 1

Article Tools